Monday 2 July 2012

Where is the love? Humans do bicker and blame others, when can thefinger-pointing stop?

DISCLAIMER: This is a general post on the most general level, being my first attempt at using the Blogger app for iPhone I just downloaded from the App Store. I am not personally lashing out at anyone but if you do feel the 'sting', maybe there's some 'truth' in what I saw and I hope you will give my points some thoughts. This isn't meant to disparage anyone and are all my personal opinion.

Now that we have done the 'disclaimer', since there are just so many 'sensitive' readers out there, who think the world revolves around them instead of them being a small part of the cosmic system, here goes.

I think in this topic, there are generally three types of people.

1. The ones who have opinions, let others know of their opinions and they don't accept others' opinions 'graciously', the keyword here is graciously - these people I'll call 'Always Right' - usually these people resort to putting down others or launch personal attacks or drama in their feeble attempt at 'defense'.

2. The ones who have opinions but keep their opinions to themselves, and they may or may not agree with others' opinion, these people I'd like to call the 'Passive Ones' - usually these people will be sitting on the fence but when it comes to choosing sides, they will surprise you by joining in the name-calling, albeit anonymously.

3. The ones who have their opinions and let others know about them yet at the same time allows for room to discuss and accept others' opinion on a professional level with minimal hassle - I'll refer to them as the 'Open Professionals' - enough said.

These are just terms I coin to easily refer to them in this blogpost. I think the Open professionals are the most ideal but that's just my opinion, don't take my word for it.

If you cannot agree with what I say, so be it. This is my blog and a place for me to post my opinion. If everyone in the world is entitled to their opinion - If you cannot accept others' opinion, why do you wish to impose your opinion on others in the first place? Do you like it when I impose on you? No? Then why do you do it to others' then? Are you a more superior human being that others need to listen to you and you only? You know there is a thin line between imposing, forcing and 'bullying'? I am 'talking' to the first group, the 'Always Right'.

To the second group, why are you so 'cowardly' and do not even own up to your own opinion and resort to 'anonymous chicken' comments, especially in the cyber world. You think you are 'safe' and anonymous, but trust me, there isn't such thing as privacy online, nothing is completely private unless you resort to totally not go online, erase all your records, change your name and live in a remote area.

Why act surprised when your information is easily dug up via a simple google or Facebook search? Then you usually will play the victim and use the words/phrases like 'I usually maintain a low profile', I didn't mean it that way, 'I didn't write that out of malice, I was drunk/insane/account hijacked/forced by my dog/__fill in the blank__ to write that comment. The point is they wish to have nothing to do or own up to their comments. I think the Passive Ones are even worse than the first group in the sense of taking ownership of their own actions, especially online. Usually the first and second groups - Always Right and Passive Ones are interchangeable, they may share some things in comment, that I call a lethal combination.

EXAMPLE: On fb, set on a 'public' privacy setting, one innocent picture of several young girls in their 20s who pose for a camwhoring session. They are just girls having fun with the camera.

I shall use Mr as a generic term and do not mean to disparage men in general, same principle as saying 'He' instead of bothering about the gender. I am all for gender equality BUT some form of literary uniformity is required here.

Mr Always Right 1: see what I found on fb! (shares picture by saving it and uploading it hence claiming it
His own)

Mr Passive One 1: How sexy. *expletive* (he is not using his real name when commenting)

Mr Always Right 1: yeah, *insert judgement* They are asking for it.

Mr Always Right 2: Oh, I see they are really asking for it, dressing up that way *insert expletive* hahaha

Mr Passive One 2: *insert some disparaging remarks and expletives*

Mr Always Right 3: *passes down more judgement in order to appear 'original' with his 'witty' comments on the 'topic' and in doing so, he put down the girls even more*

Mr Always Right 1: *tries to outdo everyone thus far and reminded everyone that it was him, the genius who first 'discovered' the girls and adds more disparaging remarks about the girls and suddenly it became a 'match' of who can come up with the most disparaging remarks about the girls*

Mr Passive One 3: *joins in the banter by giving his 'humble opinion' anonymously*

Mr Passive One 4: *overcame his 'shyness' and in a totally misguided sense of 'revenge' based on a personal rejection by a girl who turned him down back in high school YEARS AGO, lashed out on the girls and call them even worse names than those already mentioned before in the comments*

Mr Always Right 2: *came back online and saw that the other comments are saucier and more vicious than his previous comments, hence to boost his over inflated ego and in an attempt to 'win' the non-existent best commenter award of the thread, offered his two cents by adding in more expletives and self-righteous comments in his holier-than-thou comment*

Mr Passive One 5: *claps his virtual hands and joins in the name calling*

Mr Always Right 4: *saw that this topic is bumped a lot by the comments, hence he figured it is a 'place to be seen', hence he joined in the conversation with what he thinks is the 'best disparaging remark' and passed down judgement on the most superficial level*

Mr Always Right 5: *does not want to be left out from sharing his opinion on such a 'hot topic', and passed down his judgement by calling the girls in the picture even worse names, somehow he thought it will be clever to add in a dash of politics to the comment*

Mr Passive One 6: *obviously turned on and deliriously happy with the entire bantering and shared a personal anecdote of how these girls reminded him of the b*tch he used to date once - what we didn't know is that the date never happened beyond his imagination*

Mr Always Right 1: *not wanting to 'lose out' he topped the politics comment by Mr Always Right 5 and made a very racist and politically-fueled comment, linking the girls in the pix to 'those dirty politicians'

Mr Passive One 1: *returned online an saw how the topic has escalated to politics and joins in the excitement*

AND THE COMMENTS CONTINUED UNTIL MORE THAN 20 (or more) different people commented on it.

Somehow the 'sensational' platform which witnessed their extreme display of 'high' intellect resulted in the issue to go viral and the 'share' button on fb is put to good use.

Usually the girls in the pic don't even know what hit them. Ignorance is Bliss you say?

Totally random strangers and guys (including some fellow females) lashed out at them and judged them from head to toe, even an innocent smile is deemed improper and 'asking for it', etc. Many girls dress the same way they are dressed in the picture but somehow it is wrong just because they were target practice for over-inflated egos who love to share their 'brilliant' opinions.

I am getting all riled up here am I not? Okay, end of example 1.

DISCLAIMER OF THE EXAMPLE ABOVE: The above example is entirely fictional and created in the mind of the author and bears no resemblance to any living beings, humans or otherwise.

WHAT I FEEL SHOULD BE DONE:
The world needs more love. Love yourself, be comfortable in your own skin, solve your own insecurities and please don't lash out at strangers or even high profile personalities who do not even know your name. Everything starts from you, internally.

Those who judge are usually lacking something 'inside', hence they make up for it by passing on judgement about others and then feel 'good' about it, get a kick out of it and the vicious cycle continues.

It is true then when they say 'Big egos usually come together with self-esteem issues'. Enough said.

Some Chinese sayings/poem that my dad passed to me yesterday (Sunday), I don't read Chinese, never been to a Chinese school before, but what I can gather is - the title is "All if Good" - summary: Look at the Positive side of things, think positive, let positivity into your life:

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