Why Can't Female Teachers in Malaysia Wear Pants to Work?

Work pants or Long skirts for work?

One question I used to ask when I was still a school girl was Why can't female teachers in Malaysia wear pants to work?

I think it is some sort of a code of dressing left behind and still being practiced since the Colonial times. It has been more than 50 years since Independence, Malaysia. Time to relook and reconsider this dress code?

I remember fondly of the two years I spent as a Sixth Former in my pre-U days at St Joseph Secondary School in Kuching, Sarawak... The pride of La Salle in Borneo.  The female teachers are allowed to wear pants.

The term who wears the pants also mean who is in control and have a say in deciding stuff so I guess not being allowed to wear pants may stem from a lack of gender equality as well. That is a whole different topic altogether so I won't delve into that.

But hello it is 2016 already ... Mengapa guru wanita tidak boleh memakai seluar panjang sebagai pakaian rasmi semasa bertugas?

With the fiasco on social media last year concerning our national Gold Medalist Gymnast Farah Ann Abdul Hadi who won six medals including two gold at the SEA games focusing on the V-line of her leotard instead of her gold victory speaks volumes about just how petty and archaic-thinking SOME of my fellow countrymen are. So I rest my case.

All opinions are expressed from my own personal view which you may agree or not agree but each to their own. I would like to clarify that I come from a family of Teachers and headmistress and principals. My baby sister is still a teacher in a government national school. So I do know what I am talking about. You don't have to agree. #peace

Sensitive Heart

I wonder how people can be so insensitive and when talking they just want to drag you in and make you feel bad, as bad as they are feeling.

Example, topic: having many kids does not guarantee they will grow up to be close to you. So one person, A person says B person shares the same fate. Then out of the blue, A says "like your parents, they have a son (my brother) but your brother isn't by their side, he just says he wanna fly and just flew away." Touché. 

Really touché.

It's not like my brother is overseas for fun. It's not like he doesn't call back on a weekly basis on the webcam to chat with face shown and whatsapp a few times a week. I bit my tongue to lash back. Useless to fight your point with this kinda person. They already see things through their tinted glass. If you refute one point, they will try to get another point to intentionally 'hurt' you so that you will feel almost as bad and as miserable as they are feeling.

I choose to learn to ignore those bullets and won't allow those words to be ammunition against me. 

What my brother does or what anyone dear to me does you can say all you want but only us know what is the real big picture. 

If saying such biased stuff makes you feel better in your miserable life, then I allow it, out of compassion, at least I am doing some merit/good deeds. 

I shall let it be and let it go. I shall let pity and compassion take over other negative feelings like anger and hurt.

Today, I make a conscious effort NOT to fall back to my old habit of replaying negative conversations over and over in my head. I choose to live life to the fullest and learn to pity those who can't and are envious of others. I have a brother who is a doctor and the pride of the family. Not many people can say that, can they? *wink*

Peace be unto this world where insecurities and ego make people fight over the smallest things.

Papparich Service Terrible... Sucks doesn't even begin to describe it

Never thought my year-end post will be like this but here goes, LONG POST AHEAD, and I am still fuming hot!

Papparich Service Terrible

We arrived to a busy restaurant. A slight delay is unavoidable so we were prepared to wait half an hour or so... who knows it took an hour plus for our tummy to be filled. We are 4 adults and a baby. We took our seats with a 10-month-old baby. Asked for high chair before we sat down. Purposely went to the counter in front to ask. In the end we, one has to search for a baby chair ourselves. Sat down. No menu. Had to walk to get it ourselves. Pressed button many times.
Filled form. We submitted our form before the Indian customers two tables away. They haven't even arrived when we submitted the order form.
Indian customers get their drinks first. We waited patiently. Half an hour later no drinks.
Table 69 that is us grew hungry and impatient.
They forgot our order.
Even the table that arrived later than the Indians (no racism intended) got their drinks.

Then one person got her meal 45 minutes after ordering. Second person got her meal 15 mins later. Then last two waited till the other two nearly finished. I finished my drink and ordered another one. It never came.

Went to pay immediately after finishing the very late last two meals as baby is growing restless after more than an hour there.

Thirsty as my second drink never arrived. Messed up my order and brought wrong drink I didn't order.
Manager a Chinese, asked cashier to give 15% discount with no service tax. Cashier gave 8% discount. Then rectified and gave 15% discount but charged service tax for lousy service.had to leave fast as baby was crying. What's the point of saying won't charge service tax and give discount but in the end charge also. Liar.
The men laughed at me when I said I was thirsty. Manager even laughed and offered my drink that never arrived saying cheng lei yam. I said I dont feel like it anymore and he snickered. I then raised my voice and said why so funny. Kenapa ketawa. No one said sorry for snickering at my complaint. Said sorry for service. Can simply laugh at people. I never said any bad words or swear. Simply unprofessional. Pappa rich Sri Rampai near my house is way better than this Sunway Pyramid outlet.
I demand a proper apology for bad service cheating me of a promised discount and for laughing at a customer. I am deeply offended and disappointed.

Receipt number 428606 Saturday Dec 21 2013

Exact complaint lodged at Papparich official website tonight

P/s - Yes, of course they gave me hot water while waiting for my baby's bottle, and yes, they did offer me air kosong, plain water after I asked at the cashier when paying - don't you have water? Kamu tidak ada air kosong ka? More than 5 times. FIVE FREAKING TIMES and MORE.

Do It Anyway - Quote from Mother Theresa

Quote from Mother Theresa:

"Do It Anyway"

People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway. 

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; be kind anyway.

If you are successful,  you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway.

 

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; be happy anyway. 

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;  do good anyway.

 

Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough; give the world you have anyway.

You see in the final analysis it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway.

Relationship Expiry Date

People say I am too sensitive (as my weakness) and yes I admit it. If I am not sensitive I won't be the caring person that I am and I won't care so much and give so much. 

If they think it is not worth their time to accept that about me and wanna keep their distance then by all means do so. I have learned to desensitise myself from people who drifted too far away from my life over the years. 

A clap takes both hands to work. I am just tired. And it still hurts each time a clap doesn't work and I have to let go but the hurt dulls after awhile.

Some relationships really do have an expiry date. Sometimes when a bridge doesn't work, a construction is due for a wall.

How to Get Cheaper Insurance Premium for Cars Over 10 years old

My car is over the 10-year-mark and with all the extra loading charges it just isn't feasible for me to keep paying a high insurance premium for my car which has depreciated in value. 

Last year when my greenie (my car) was 13 years old my dad suggested I change to a third party insurance as my car value is already below RM10k. National car loses value fast. If your car is an imported brand please don't switch to third party coverage so fast, check the value of your car first.

MMIP (Malaysian Motor Insurance Pool) administered by MMIP Services Sdn Bhd is actually a pool of different insurance companies who 'share' the insurance of people opting for insurance for their older cars. It is for people whose car could not get the coverage from the usual insurance anymore or the premium is too high and not worth paying for a first party coverage anymore.

I had it done at the post office without a hassle in 2012 along with my vehicle road tax renewal. However in August 2013 it is a different story. 

I went to two different post offices for many times in a week and only to be told my NCD (non claim bonus) is zero whereas my last year's printed NCD is 55%, the maximum. 

I was baffled and I was told to come back another day when the system is online as it appears to be offline. I got this 'offline' excuse for a whole week from Aug 20-26, including on Saturday where the lady on Friday asked me to come early Sat morning to try my luck as 'the system may be open by then'. No such luck.

With my road tax and insurance expiring on Aug 26, I panicked when I was told again that MMIP is still offline and I decided to use the next lowest premium insurance, Multipurpose Insurans... Which is 2.5 times MORE in premium. 

However when they checked my NCD it is still zero. I was like 'No Way I am gonna lose my NCD for something I never claimed!' They said I need to wait for the email if post office is to email them to enquire as they do not entertain phone calls. My road tax would have expired long by then and I will have a perfectly working car with no legal right to drive it as it has no road tax. 

I had long known Uni Asia agents nearby is of no use to renew MMIP motor insurance. In Setapak Wangsa Maju area, there is one opposite KL Festival City on the same row as the new branch of Public Bank, about two blocks away, the post office lady told me about it on Aug 23 me asked me to renew my MMIP insurance at Uni Asia agent office opposite KL Festival City Shopping Mall. I parked legally by a busy road and walked up to the quiet shop lot and had to be doubly sure and walked back out to check out the signboard... There is no indication of Uni Asia at the steps. I knocked on the glass door or a very bare office and a young girl was hesitant to open the door for me. She was all alone and here isn't any signs of Uni Asia logo in that office. I asked if it was Uni Asia and she asked who specifically I was looking for. I said I wanted to renew my insurance and the post office asked me to do it here. They don't do general insurance so no renewal of motor insurance there, they only do life insurance and investment savings plans.

Then I drove to the Land Transport Authority (JPJ) and sought out the Uni Asia agent there. I was told they have no access to online system for MMiP and they need to do it manually by fax and it will take hours. That's it. HQ it is, since I am in the capital city anyway.

Hence I checked out the address for MMIP and got my dad to drive me there (thanks Pa) as my car is legally unmovable now.

Parking costs RM3 at Bangunan Malaysian RE for the first hour and RM3 for subsequent hours. Don't ask me why it is called Malaysian RE. It shares the building with MNRB and should come just before PNB building. Go up to 6th floor. 

The map captured on my phone is as below: 

HOWEVER NOTE THAT YOU CANNOT RENEW YOUR INSURANCE AT THEIR HQ. It is only a bodily claim department. You still need to travel to Uni Asia HQ or Multipurpose Insurance HQ to do it or at their respective agents nationwide. Sometimes due to the hassle people ended up paying double or more to save the hassle. Your call.

They could check my NCD though and it is still 55%. Pos Malaysia couldn't check the system after they upgraded their system with JPJ or something hence it always appear as zero for them.

The nice Malay personnel there said my Insurance is under Multipurpose Insurans and not Uni Asia. And they gave me a slip of the insurance HQ (I think many people must have thronged the MMIP HQ) they already cut out slips of printed papers of Uni Asia and Multipurpose Insurans HQ address. They even told me how to get there with specific landmarks and directions. Bless them.

So my dad and I went down to the city

and passed by Kompleks Wilayah, Oriental Daily HQ and got to CapSquare. I was told to go to 8th floor but when they saw it was third party I was directed to 10th floor. Got there by 4pm. All was done by 4.30pm.

Effective this year all insured need to fill up and sign a proposal form like this. 

The lady at the payment counter told me to only renew my insurance a day after as due to the system upgrading by JPJ, it doesn't seem to link well with the insurance companies. She said: "We already update here on our system but it is slow to appear on their side and they point the finger at us and customers call us up to scold us". So since it would be 5pm after I leave the area I decided to go straight to JPJ the next day. I won't even try Pos Malaysia anymore, not with their masalah sistem and system offline issues the past week.

Mission half accomplished.

Next day, I went to JPJ. Got a legal parking space after 5 minutes of hovering. Got a number. Squeeze through the standing crowd and got a nice seat and waited for about 30 minutes while I read my book. My number was called and it was all done within 60 seconds. Yup, that fast.  From red last year it is blue this year, the road tax sticker I mean.

Replaced my road tax on my wind screen and I am good for another year!

Premium has gone up by RM10 this year compared to the RM90plus last year but I don't mind. My car doesn't go further than 25km of my area anyway. I am a blissful housewife/mother again. :) 

Note: They kept saying on their websites to only opt for MMIP when you could no longer get any company to insure your car. It is 'high risk' insurance so to speak. So please do your research and decide for yourself if it is for you.

Missed Moment of Motherhood

Today my little one just rolled over for the first time from his back to his tummy and I wasn't there to witness it as I was at work....

I feel like I missed one important milestone in my baby's life and feel dreadful after that, I still feel awful as I am typing this so I feel that something's gotta give.... Hmmmm anyway, I digress.

Motherhood is not all bed and roses and taking a tip from one article directed at new mothers, I follow this one golden rule: Take time to look at the pictures of your little one when he is asleep. Looking at pictures of him is totally different from looking at your baby because when you are looking at him you are pressured to meet his needs and cater to him while you will appreciate the miracle your little one is if you look at the pix which gives you an overall sense of wonder at this little bundle of joy. 

I have been shielding my son from the virtual public world since his birth with his face mosaic off on this blog and now that he's over 4 months old, here's an unflattering pix of him with his eyes shut when he took a short nap in the car seat today, tired after playing for the whole afternoon at grandparents' house. He is so very much loved. We love you baby boy. Hugs and kisses. 

When It is Just Isn't Your Day and You Feel Down (more like you feel like shit)

Today just isn't my day.

My car battery went dead on me and I was already running late for work.

Instead of waiting to get it sorted out, I hailed a taxi from in front of my home and got to work within a reasonable time frame.

Then I had a 2pm-4pm break and the sky looked very dark. As if my mood isn't dark enough for the day.

It was then that I decided to take the cab back home to check on my baby boy, dark sky or not.

By the time I reached home, rain started pouring and the thunderous sky had an angry sounding orchestra up above.

My little one's smiling face changed to a frown and then his mouth turned downwards and he started wailing with the first thunder. The second lightning came and the second thunder sounded, causing him to wail even more. I picked him up and cuddled him while singing a nonsense lullaby that I just made up on the spot and he calmed down and settled into a singing response to me, cooing all the way in my arms as the thunders continue their symphony.

Bad day or not, I felt needed and I am glad I made that short trip back home right there and then before going back to work at 4pm later.

If you let them, babies have a way of brightening your day... the keyword here is "if you let them".

I have decided to let my baby taken over my life and my heart. Thank you baby boy.

Back to work now. :-)

Feeling Emo

Long post ahead...

It has been quite some time since I last played any games on my iPhone or facebook, before Candy Crush became the craze for (almost) everyone.

Back when my late mom in law (MiL) was still alive and then diagnosed with final stage cancer, I was a regular in some Zynga games on mobile, and actually had some 'regular' game partners called 90tomh and worshipdrummer. Then I quit to attend to more pressing matters at home since my MiL stayed with us in her final days and left a message in our last game, to which worshipdrummer replied, giving me comforting words.

Now more than 200 days later, much have happened after my MiL passed away, had a baby boy, then attended my MiL's funeral, etc. then I checked out those games again and saw that it has been more than 200 days.

I checked back 11 days later and the game requests were still unanswered, I guess they too have moved on and dumped the game.

Some things can never be the same as time goes on. 

The only constant is change. This made me very emotional when I think about it. My baby will be a little boy soon and by the time he enters primary (elementary) school I will be 40. You can never return to all the 'good old times', that's why they inserted the word 'old' in everything nice and fine.

Am I scared of old age? A little... I will be lying if I say no. Am I afraid of death? Yes, sudden death especially, I wish to have some time to prepare myself and plan my 'exit' from this life.

It is the start of the 14th week for my darling son. He just turned exactly 3 months old last week, according to the calendar month. I was just looking at his newborn pix and I nearly teared up seeing how small he was back then. He has a little boy face now... I am torn in between wanting to see how he will grow up yet I am sad when I know he is growing and will never be as small and this way anymore. Human dilemma of not sure how to feel.

Guess everyone deal with grief their own way. I guess this is my grief talking. I haven't fully cried out after my MiL passed away as both hubby and me made a promise not to cry near her body. 

Having such precious happiness in my arms now in the form of my son and then losing my MiL seems like a cruel joke played on me by nature. 

I haven't dealt with the sadness or even the anger and frustration of the situation.

Yes I have busied myself with my baby for three full months and I was too tired to even think of anything on a daily basis. I do enjoy my baby tremendously.

But last night, my baby slept through the night and only woke up at 5.30am for his feeding, giving me a good night's sleep... 

As I woke up refreshed...which isn't a bad thing, and then these feelings flooded in, as I am only human. 

All these while fatigue helped me delay facing my grief. 

Now... Sigh. Mommy I hope you are happy where you are now, I know you are at peace now. Know that your youngest son and me don't feel the same without you around the house. We sorely miss you... More than words can say.

- end -

Reminder to Self

This serves as a reminder to myself:

I may be stressed but if I compare the things that are stressing me out, others may have it worse than me, so I am blessed to be stressed by these things;

I may be irked with whatever or whoever now but others may have it worse than me, so I am blessed to be irked by them now, I know it could be much worse;

I may be aware of the growing fine lines on my face, but I have a face to look back at me when I look into the mirror, and I am comfortable in my skin, and for that I am grateful;

I may be fatter than those thinner than me but I am healthy (relatively) and fine, and I have all my faculties complete, mental, physical and emotional, I can walk with my fat calves, My stubby fingers are able, and I am me for all that I am worth;

I may feel lost or unloved but ultimately if I am not loving myself enough, how can another love me when I myself deem myself worthy of my own love?

I look back and count my blessings, I look around now and count my blessings and with a heart full of gratitude, I remind myself that I am grateful for all that has been bestowed upon me;

I may stumble in life and have low period of mood, but ultimately I have always picked myself up no matter how hard it was, and this time around, I can do it too!

There is a reason I am still alive, and until the day I really die, there is still a reason I am alive. Sometimes there are more than one reason, so REMEMBER THAT!

Sue* Jan 17, 2013.

Pix taken in April 2012, at Orlando, Florida, USA.

NEVER GIVE UP

Quote of the day

Everything can be taken from a man except one thing: the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way. ~ Viktor Frankl.

So don't ever ever say you "don't have a choice". Life is a matter of making decisions and choices about how YOU want to respond to Life.

Everyone has a choice, starting with think positively as opposed to think negatively.

Remember the choice is always yours. Quitters say it is impossible, winners go get it done without much excuses or even negative thoughts about how big the challenge may be.

All talk no action will only result in the below as depicted in the image.

Food for thought on Nov 22, 2012.